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Quick Parent Tip: Father’s Day Edition (Reblog)

Happy Father’s Day to all my Dads out there! We celebrate your accomplishments, sacrifices, and love today!

Let’s dive straight into today’s encouraging Quick Parent Tip for this Father’s Day weekend:

Fight for your family. You are your family’s physical, mental, and spiritual protector. Embrace it. Fight for peace in your home and for your family’s unity and mental stability. Fight… Fight… Fight! You got this because you are not alone. I believe in you!

Accept responsibility. You are responsible for everything that happens and fails to happen in your home. Let me be the first to tell you that this is both an honor and a burden. Regardless, keep pressing! Accept your responsibility willingly and take pride in being the leader of your home. Keep making decisions with your family’s best interest in mind.

Teach your family. You are a great teacher and mentor for your family. You have the wisdom, knowledge, and experience to do it; just believe in yourself! Remember, more is caught than taught, so continue to set the example with your words and actions.

Hearing vs listening. We all do it. We look up, see someone’s lips moving, and realize they have been talking to us the entire time. It’s ok. Next time, engage in active communication. Hearing is passive (i.e. your ears recognize a sound); however, listening is active. So be actively engaged in conversations today. Ask questions, nod along, mirror body language, and share the moment!

Elevate your perception of your contributions. I know you are working your butt off, and oftentimes, it feels like it goes unnoticed. I want to encourage you to keep doing it. Your hard work, decisions, love, protection, and care are definitely making a difference. Even if no one else celebrates you this weekend, I am celebrating you right now! Great job brother! You are doing exactly what you need to be doing!

Relax and recover. Take some time to focus on the positives–the great things you have done for your family! You have done (and continue to do) what many have turned away from. Rest well knowing that your impact is felt by more than those in your household. Society is indebted to you.

Thank you for your hard work, commitment, and sacrifices! Happy Father’s Day!

For those reading this who are not fathers, please take some time to thank a father this weekend. I promise you it means a lot!

Olaolu Ogunyemi: U.S. Marine Officer | Mentor | Best-selling Author
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Embrace where you are!

One of the best parts about visiting my hometown is stopping by some of the places that brought me wonderful memories. I guess you could say I am often overcome with acute nostalgia. One place I always like to visit is my old job that I worked during my college days. This time around, I reflected not only on the fun times I had and the great people I met but on the lessons I learned that I still apply today. The best way to describe my time there is to borrow a quote from Charles Dickens: “it was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” Regardless, the biggest lesson I learned was to embrace where you are because there is a lesson in everything. Here are some of the lifelong lessons I learned!:

My old job in Ruston, LA

Servitude.

Although my name tag introduced me as a “server,” I absolutely hated that label. I preferred to be called a “waiter,” because “server” felt degrading, demeaning, and humiliating. “I work and study hard, so I am no one’s servant!” I often quipped. It wasn’t until later that I truly understood and began to appreciate how important servitude is. In fact, I learned that servitude is one of every successful organization’s core values, and it is one of each inspirational leader’s foundational principles. Servitude is not about degrading the servant’s self-esteem as I previously believed; instead, it is about putting another’s needs before your own to create an environment where everyone can grow, develop, and thrive. Serving others is an honor.

Servitude is not about degrading the servant’s self-esteem as I previously believed; instead, it is about putting another’s needs before your own to create an environment where everyone can grow, develop, and thrive.

Humility.

I always considered myself a hard-working guy who does not mind getting dirty. Like seriously, I worked on a chicken farm in high school for crying out loud. I always envisioned I would use that blue-collar mentality to become the leader known for rolling up his sleeves and standing shoulder to shoulder with his constituents to get the job done. Even so, there was a part of my job as a server that completely humbled me–“crab leg night.” On “crab leg night,” we added crab legs and other seafood items to the buffet. Aside from holidays like Mother’s Day, these were by far the busiest shifts. Of course there was nothing wrong with “crab leg night” in general; however, some customers really tested how far my attitude of servitude would stretch! From complaining about prices, to questioning me about the quality of the food, to throwing crab legs on the floor, to leaving a $0.27 tip; my humility was truly tested. Even so, I had to question why I was getting frustrated with these type of customers who made up a very small percentage of the customers I served. I finally concluded that I was frustrated because I felt this kind of work was “beneath me.” That was a red flag because it was contradictory to my can do, blue-collar philosophy. That day I took an oath to never allow myself to become so consumed by my own self-worth that I am unable to willingly and cheerfully serve others.

Forgiveness.

Remember those busy “crab leg nights” I mentioned? Funny story: I actually made a pretty big mistake at the Peking in West Monroe, LA during one of the busiest crab leg nights I’ve ever worked. I remember it like it was yesterday: the team and I were working hard to keep customers satisfied–refilling drinks, busing tables, serving orders etc. Well, it was my turn to make some more sweet tea. As I had done numerous times before, I grabbed two buckets and headed to grab sugar. The first container I opened was completely empty, so I quickly moved on to the second container. Once I opened the second container, I observed the white granular content within and proceeded to scoop it into my buckets. About five minutes later, one customer stopped me to tell me her tea did not taste right… Then another… Then another. Before long, everyone in the restaurant who previously had a taste for sweet tea was now waving their glass in the air while making a disgusted face. I am sure it was only about four or five customers, but to me, it seemed like the entire restaurant was about to start a riot. That is when one of the customers yelled, “this is salty, and I’m a diabetic!” If you haven’t figured it out by now, I put about two giant scoops of salt in the “sweet tea.” I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t tasted it myself. It reminded me of my first time wrestling with my brothers in the Atlantic Ocean.

My face when I realized what I did 😂

Several customers requested free meals and other accomodations to make up for their salty surprise. As expected, the manager on duty (who happened to be the owner of this particular restaurant chain) was not very happy with me. After my shift, I walked in her office fully expecting to be written up and charged for several meals for making such a silly yet costly mistake. Instead, she asked me what happened, then told me to be more careful in the future. She forgave me for what should have been an easily-avoidable mistake and inadvertently taught me a lesson about forgiveness: You can win more people over by forgiving them than administering the punishment they know they deserve. From that day, I was bought in, and I did my best to represent myself and the company well throughout each interaction. Her forgiveness earned my loyalty and respect.

You can win more people over by forgiving them than administering the punishment they know they deserve.

Hard work.

Gordon B. Hinckley has a quote that has resonated with me: “without hard work, nothing grows but weeds.” I believe I relate to this quote because I have literally spent countless hours pulling weeds while doing yard work, and I metaphorically understand how much we grow and develop from each of our experiences. When I was working as a server, I learned that my work ethic had a direct correlation with my success. There was nothing like staying on your feet for a few hours while striving to ensure each of my customers had a pleasant experience. My customers’ smiles, words of encouragement, tips, and appreciation gave me a sense of accomplishment at the end of the day. Pretty soon, I began to crave that feeling of accomplishment and that has become one of my driving forces throughout the day. Work hard and grow.

Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds.

Gordon B. Hinckley

Sacrifice.

One of my least favorite parts about working at Peking was missing my little brother’s and oldest nephew’s basketball games. It annoyed me so much that I considered just not showing up to work a couple of times. These thoughts were usually short-lived when I remembered I had bills to pay, but more importantly, I accepted that life often presents us opportunities to accept temporary discomfort for long-term results.

I accepted that life often presents us opportunities to accept temporary discomfort for long-term results.

I knew my time at Peking would be short-lived, but I had to remain focused on why I was working there in the first place and how much I was growing in the process. Though I sacrificed quite a bit of my social life, I gained the financial stability I needed to prepare me for life after college which included marriage, children, and starting a career. All of the lessons I learned and the sacrifices I made during this time in my life came to head and made me the man I am today. Although I remain a work in progress, I am grateful that I chose to embrace my time as a server, and I implore you to embrace where you are today. You can and will grow from this!

That was my experience, but what have you learned from your past experiences? What can you learn as you embrace where you are now?

Olaolu Ogunyemi: U.S. Marine Officer | Mentor | Best-selling Author

Check out my blog at https://parent-child-connect.com/blog for more great posts like this!

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FREE Downloadable Resource for Parents, Teachers, and Mentors!

Introducing my second FREE downloadable resource! The Three Day Mental Health Guide: Major Payne Edition (pictured right)

I love free stuff! Don’t you? That’s why I am so excited to offer another free downloadable resource for parents, teachers, and mentors! Introducing the Three Day Mental Health Guide: Major Payne Edition!

In this guide, you will learn strategies to raise mentally tough children. I initially created this guide with the “father-son” relationship in mind; however, I quickly realized that readers can apply the strategies discussed within to any relationship! This guide is broken into three different sections: Day 1-“A Tough Topic;” Day 2– “Time to Break the Mold!;” and Day 3– “The ‘Major Payne’ Leadership Model.” On Day 1, we focus on the importance of discussing mental health—a topic that is considered taboo in numerous homes. On Day 2, we dispel the myths associated with society’s view of masculinity and mental toughness. Finally, on Day 3, we discuss the “Major Payne” leadership model that we can apply to be effective leaders. Each section ends with a prompt to get your wheels turning.

Parents, teachers, and mentors, this is an excellent resource for all ages so feel free to use this guide to lead your children on their own personal journey towards excellent mental health. Together, we can build mentally tough children who excel at whatever they put their minds to!

Download, share, post in your home/office, hang on your website, do whatever you want with this guide. It is yours to keep!

Click the button below or go to http://www.parent-child-connect.com/free-resources to download your FREE copy NOW!

Three Day Mental Health Guide: Major Payne Edition
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Conquer Anxiety & Toxicity

Proven techniques to help you reclaim your life. Get unstuck and thrive!

Hello my friends! Imagine being able to stay in the comfort of your home listening to top experts giving you tools and strategies that are proven to conquer anxiety.

Imagine your child’s future of success and resilience. Imagine you being able to feel confident within yourself. Now that’s invaluable! You can join “Conquer Anxiety & Toxicity” for FREE and gain access to live interviews from experts in the industry. Use this link to sign up!

Not convinced you should attend yet? Here’s a little more background:

My friend, Deb Kartz, asked me to help her lead a life-changing pre-recorded summit for parents and professionals to take a deeper look into Anxiety and how it can impact the lives of children, teens, and adults! Yes, anxiety is your body’s natural response to stress and helps us notice dangerous situations and focus our attention, so we stay safe. However, when anxiety starts to interfere with daily activities and routines, and you or your child feels nervous, panicky, or fearful on a regular basis, it is when you need to face those internal feelings.

When you’re feeling anxious or having a panic attack, do you notice your palms get sweaty, and your heart feels like it’s going through your chest?

Is your child glued to your hip and won’t sleep in their bed?

What about your teen who makes all the excuses in the world not to go to school?

Is this what you’re experiencing?

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to reduce your anxiety so you can keep moving forward with confidence? Have you felt stuck and frustrated because your child is stuck in their emotions, feeling anxious, shy, or angry?

If so, I have something mind-blowing to share with you, but you’ve got to act fast before it disappears!

You’re invited to be a part of this amazing summit with expert speakers to help you get unstuck and receive the tools to make a difference in your life and your children. We are putting this pre-recorded summit on so you can get the tools and thrive with confidence.

This event, “Conquer Anxiety & Toxicity,” will give new light and hope to moms, parents, caregivers, and professionals.

Did you know Anxiety disorders are among the most common and most treatable mental health conditions that impact adults, children, and teens?

Parents are uniquely positioned to help their children because children look up to their parents for reassurance and safety.

The biggest misconception about anxiety is people think it should be avoided, which can cause adults and children to fall into a bigger trap and feel anxious, fearful, and angry.

Conquer Anxiety & Toxicity” will open a new doorway so you will learn new ways to approach your anxiety and your children’s anxiety. With proven techniques, tools, and strategies, you will feel confident in yourself, and you will see your child grow with self-esteem and be resilient.

This 21-Day summit aims to build awareness that anxiety is treatable. You will have new insight into dealing with your child’s stress and see when they are stuck in their emotions; you will be able to work through it together. You will gain confidence in yourself as a parent with anxiety. This 21-day pre-recorded summit is FULL of scientific studies backed with research that gives you the tools to get unstuck and flourish and help your child and loved ones who are suffering in silence with anxiety.

My friend Deb Kartz is a Parent and Wellness Coach and creator of “Conquer Anxiety & Toxicity.” She wants to share this exclusive invitation for you to be fully immersed in your heart’s dream to go from feeling trapped inside your body to feeling confident within yourself and have your child flourish with self-esteem. Deb wants you to receive guidance from experts she hand-picked for their expertise in anxiety.

Sign up here!

Deb is a mother of three grown children who once lived a life of complete turmoil and trauma for over two decades. After years of research and education, she has been able to help her children through their trauma and transform her own life. Her passion is to educate and help others understand the importance of nature, nurture, and growth.

Together with my friends and colleagues, I want to give you the encouragement and knowledge to get unstuck with your anxiety and be resilient to promote a nurturing, safe, engaging environment for your children. You will have the tools to encourage your children’s social, emotional, intellectual, and behavioral competencies! Don’t let anxiety take over. You have it in you to thrive; you just need the tools to break the cycle.

I’ll be sharing my own methods on how you can conquer anxiety and toxicity! Anxiety and toxicity are just another way that sneaky “shadow” tries to creep into our life and our children’s lives. As my Amazon best-seller Crow From the Shadow says, “The Shadow is a person… or maybe a thing… or a place. The Shadow tells me who to be, how to go, and where to stay.” Not anymore! We are going to expose that sneaky shadow and kick ’em to the curb! Join us for FREE as we #defeattheshadow to conquer anxiety and toxicity!

Olaolu Ogunyemi: U.S. Marine, mentor, Best-selling Author, and your expert on how to #defeattheshadow to conquer anxiety and toxicity!
Olaolu Ogunyemi U.S. Marine | Mentor | Best-selling Author

Invite a friend… or two… or one thousand (it’s up to you)! Just forward the link to whomever you’d like to invite!